import random

class verb(object):
    def __init__(self,plural,singular,tense):
        self.singular = singular
        self.plural = plural
        self.tense = tense

class noun(object):
    def __init__(self,word,person,number):    
        self.word = word
        self.person = person
        self.number = number

class phrase(object):
    def __init__(self, present, past, active, dobject):
        self.present = present
        self.past = past
        self.active = active
        self.dobject = dobject

auxilliary_verbs = [
    verb("will", "will", "present"), 
    verb("could", "could", "present"),
    verb("are", "is", "active"),
    verb("have", "has", "past")
]

subjects = [

    noun("new labour",3,1),
    noun("brussels",3,1),
    noun("the bbc",3,1),
    noun("the e.u.",3,1),
    noun("the euro",3,1),
    noun("the loony left",3,1),
    noun("the unions",3,2),       # May be a bit quaint this one
    noun("channel 4",3,1),
    noun("your local council",3,1),


    noun("the french",3,2),
    noun("the germans",3,2),
    noun("the poles",3,2),
    noun("brussels bureaucrats",3,2),
    noun("muslims",3,2),
    noun("immigrants",3,2),        # Except those from the UK to Spain & the Algarve of course
    noun("teachers",3,2),
    noun("the unemployed",3,2),
    noun("gypsies",3,2),
    noun("yobs",3,2),
    noun("hoodies",3,2),
    noun("feral children",3,2),    # They hate children *and* paedophiles FFS, make your minds up
    noun("chavs",3,2),
    noun("the p.c. brigade",3,2),

    
    noun("asylum seekers",3,2),    # Nicer way of saying 'brown people'
    noun("gays",3,2),
    noun("lesbians",3,2),
    noun("single mothers",3,2),
    noun("paedophiles",3,2),
    

    noun("gordon brown",3,1),
    noun("alistair darling",3,1),
    noun("jacqui smith",3,1),	
    
    noun("teenage sex",3,1),
    noun("political correctness",3,1),
    noun("health & safety",3,1),
    noun("feminism",3,1),
    noun("the metric system",3,1),    # For fuck's sake
    noun("dumbing-down",3,1),
#    noun("rip-off britain",3,1),
    noun("the internet",3,1),
    noun("facebook",3,1),             # I CAN'T BELIEVE THE MAIL ACTUALLY SAID FACEBOOK COULD GIVE YOU CANCER, FOR REAL
    noun("filth on television",3,1),
    noun("the human rights act",3,1),
    noun("the nanny state",3,1),
    noun("cancer",3,1),               # Could cancer give you cancer?
    noun("binge drinking",3,1),
    noun("the MMR jab",3,1),          # Murdering cunts
    noun("the house price crash",3,1) # Hahahaha
]

# Transitive phrases (i.e. bad thing they do)
transitive_phrases = [
    phrase("give", "given", "giving", "cancer"),
    phrase("give", "given", "giving", "cancer"), # Have it twice as they're so bloody obsessed by it
    phrase("infect", "infected", "infecting", "with AIDS"),
    phrase("give", "given", "giving", "swine flu"),
    phrase("make", "made", "making", "obese"),
    phrase("give", "given", "giving", "diabetes"),
    phrase("make", "made", "making", "impotent"),

    phrase("turn","turned","turning","gay"),    # Cunts

    phrase("scrounge off","scrounged off","scrounging off",""),
    phrase("tax", "taxed", "taxing", ""),
    phrase("cheat", "cheated", "cheating", ""),
    phrase("defraud", "defrauded", "defrauding", ""),
    phrase("steal from","stolen from","stealing from",""),
    phrase("burgle","burgled","burgling",""),
    phrase("devalue","devalued","devaluing",""),
    phrase("rip off","ripped off","ripping off",""),
    
    phrase("molest","molested","molesting",""),
    phrase("have sex with","had sex with","having sex with",""),
    phrase("impregnate", "impregnated", "impregnating", ""),
    
    phrase("steal the identity of","stolen the identity of","stealing the identity of",""),	

    phrase("destroy","destroyed","destroying",""),
    phrase("kill","killed", "killing",""),
    phrase("ruin","ruined","ruining",""),
    phrase("hurt","hurt", "hurting","")
]


dobjects = [
    "the british people",
    "the middle class",
    "middle britain", # Cunts
    "england",

    "hard-working families",
    "homeowners",
    "pensioners",
    "drivers",
    "taxpayers",
    "taxpayers' money",

    "house prices",
    "property prices", # Hahahahahahahaa
    
    "britain's farmers",
    "the countryside",

    "british justice",
    "british sovereignty",
    "common sense and decency",

    "the queen",    # God bless 'er
    "the royal family",
    "the church",

    "you",
    "your mortgage",
    "your pension",
    "your daughters",
    "your children",
    "your house",
    "your pets",

    "the conservative party",  # FAIL
    "the memory of diana",
    "Britain's swans",          # This always stays
    "Cadbury" # iconic!
];

def match_verb_and_subject(subject,verb):
    if ((subject.number == 1) and (subject.person == 3)):
        return verb.singular
    else:
        return verb.plural

def match_verb_and_tense(verb,phrase):
    if (verb.tense == "present"):
        return phrase.present
    elif (verb.tense == "past"):
        return phrase.past
    elif (verb.tense == "active"):
        return phrase.active

    

def generate():
    subject = random.choice(subjects)
    phrase = random.choice(transitive_phrases)
    verb = random.choice(auxilliary_verbs)
    dobject = random.choice(dobjects)

    sentence = [match_verb_and_subject(subject, verb),
                subject.word,
                match_verb_and_tense(verb,phrase),
                dobject]

    if (phrase.dobject != ""):
        sentence.append(phrase.dobject)

    s = " ".join(sentence).upper()
    return s + "?"